Wednesday, February 25, 2009

That Used to Be Me....

So, today I had the pleasure of having coffee with a dear old friend from college. I haven't really seen him since my 20th birthday...yes, I remember exactly when due to an eventful event, and I LOVED, loved it.

As we were sitting there, we were reminiscing about how things were 7+ years ago...I tell you what, it was a whole different lifetime ago. Andy was one of the guys who Liz and I hung out with every weekend, and probably 2-4 nights during the week. His house was the local hangout and rather it was a party, dinner, or wrestling, we were always with him. Man, we did everything together.

Today, we are sitting there talking about what each of us are doing now, and it is nothing like six years ago. He is living in Wells, NV doing fire and forestry stuff and I am a freaking special ed teacher! Who'd a thunk it!!! I mean back then we both knew our majors, but we were just going through the motions of playing, with occasional homework, in order to get there. Now, we are both heavily into our careers and grown ups! BLAH!

It was so nice to finally see him. Last time I saw him he had just been rediagnosed with cancer, and I have always wondered how he was doing. I am glad to say he is still in remission and the same old Andy.

As we wrapped up our quick get together, I felt a hint of sadness. Remembering the friends, the get togethers, the late nights, early mornings, and breakfasts at Angies, made me really miss college days. I am so happy to be where I am today, but there is one year in my life I would do again, just for the good times, and that was it. It's so weird to think...that used to be me!

Saturday, February 14, 2009

The Simple Pleasures

It is Valentine evening and I am at home with my husband, son, neice, and nephew. At first I was really bummed that Dustin and I were not going to go have a big Valentine outing, with dinner and flowers, not like that always happens but I was a little bummed not to be having a romantic date.

However, I am sitting here watching my little boy and husband laugh so hard they are both gasping for air, and I could not have asked for a better Valentines Day. Carter has learned to clap today, and when Dustin got home from work, and I had Carter show him, it totally made Dustin's day.

I have been practicing Patty Cake with Carter for the last week or so, trying to get him to clap. Today when he did I was so excited, it was the best gift ever. Then to watch Carter be so proud of himself for figuring it out and being able to clap like mom and dad was so rewarding!

My nephew is here playing with Carter and every little thing he does cracks Carter up. To hear my son laugh so hard, and to see my nephew interact so well brings such a joy to my life. I honestly cannot count how many times my little man has made me smile and laugh today...who could ask for a better Valentine's Day then that?

To be a parent, and to sit and watch a dad and son interact....well life doesn't get better than that. So, to hell with Halmark and the expensive dinners, tonight was my best Valentine's date yet!

Friday, February 13, 2009

Finally...Carter is Officially Official!

Well, it has taken me a few days...okay 10!, to get around to blogging about court. I have thought about just skipping it, but it was such an important day and so fabulous, I don't feel like I can. So, here it goes.

So, we had court on February 3, I could hardly sleep and was an emotional mess Tuesday morning. I got up, showered, got ready, and then got my little man ready. Dustin was as nervous as I was, so it was kind of a quiet morning. We had to be to court at 8:30. Well, we left at 7:55, and I was a nervous wreck the entire drive. I was on the verge of tears, everything was making me emotional, and I was tired.

When we got to the court house, Nathan pulled in next to us, and we walked in together.
When we got upstairs our attorney greeted us, and Aunt Tammy was waiting as well. We talked to our attorney about what we could expect and then just continued to wait.

By 8:30 all of our family had drifted in and my nerves were out of control.
As I stated in my earlier blog, Dustin and I had agreed I would be the one going up on the stand. Oh boy, I was crawling out of my skin and everyone kept telling me, "Breathe Lindsey....Take a breath Lindsey....," etc. Blah, I needed to be nervous, it was my Little Man we were talking about here!

We had two adoptions before us and it was a little reassuring. The families would go in and about 20 minutes later, come out smiling and still had their babies. So...I was getting more hopeful.

Finally, it was our turn. The judge was already in the court room and immediately made the process very relaxed. Our attorney told Dustin and I where to sit, and then the judge told everyone else they could sit anywhere, even in the jury seats if they wanted to. They all sat behind Dustin, Carter, and me.

It began with our social worker taking the stand and testifying about our family. They talked about the adoption process, if Carter had been in our home for six months, if we had our pre and post placement studies, if she felt like we were fit to be his parents, etc. She said yes to them all!

Then came my turn....it was a cake walk! My attorney asked if I could stay seated with my family and the judge was fine with that. Les, my attorney, then began to ask questions. He asked if I felt like Dustin was a fit father, if I understood that by adopting Carter he would be treated as my own natural child, if Dustin and I were to divorce Carter would be treated as my own natural child, etc, etc. I had to really focus on what he was saying because I wanted to make sure I answered them correctly, but it was pretty easy. Then the attorney turned to Dustin and said, "Do you understand all of the questions I just asked your wife," "yes," "Do you agree?" "Yes."

The attorney then stated Carter's full name, with our last name at the end, ask the judge to accept the motion, the judge began to talk and went through some legal information and then began with, "Dustin, I hereby order you...," my heart dropped and I thought we were going to be in trouble, "to take your wife to dinner, anywhere she would like to go, as a celebration. That is court ordered, do you understand?" We all broke out in laughter, Dustin said, "Yes, Your Honor," and it was done! HOORAY!!!

I had instant tears and was so relieved. We then asked the judge if we could take Carter up for pictures, and the judge said absolutely. I took Carter up to the bench and the judge pulled a box of beanie baby toys out and told Carter to pick one. While Carter was looking the judge asked to hold him and I sent him over. It was so cute!! The judge and Carter picked out his Beanie Baby and then just hung for several minutes. The judge then pulled out his gavel and let Carter hold it.

We then had several pictures with the judge, with family, with just our family, etc. It was perfect. It truly was the best day ever! Our judge was AMAZING and made the entire experience incredible.

Dustin and I then went downstairs filled out some final paperwork, and then went to Little America with our family for breakfast. We continued to giggle and laugh and be on cloud nine all day. Dustin and I took more pictures with family and friends, and then immediately went to Costco to get them all developed!

We want to thank everyone for all of the love and support everybody has shown for our family during the last 6 months. It has been quite the ride!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

10 Things I Love....
1. Dustin being home with me at night.
2. My little man.
3. Working with kids who have severe disabilities.
4. Being with my friends and family.
5. Going on vacation.
6. Summer Break.
7. Talking on the phone.
8. Having margarita night...even if it isn't with tequilla
9. Reading a good book
10. Learning more information in subjects I'm interested in.

10 Things I Hate....
1. People who lie
2. Snow
3. When kids are disrespectful
4. Parents who don't do what it takes for their kids to be healthy
5. Judgmental people
6. Being broke all of the time.
7. A messy house
8. Doing laundry
9. Cleaning
10. Violent video games

10 Random Things About Me....
1. I think my birthmom is amazing.
2. I hope Carter gets to meet his brother one day.
3. I had my Master of Science in School Counseling by 25
4. I love to drive with my music loud and sunroof open.
5. I am pretty sure I'm supposed to be a tropical baby.
6. I want to go on a cruise this summer.
7. I have taught at an elementary, a junior high, a high school, an alternative high school, and a specialty school.
8. I love the south.
9. I want to have been to all 50 states by the time I am 50.
10. I can't wait to adopt a little girl!

I tag: Ally, Jessica, and Janelle

Sunday, February 1, 2009

The Anticipation of Court!

Well, our adoption becomes finalized Tuesday, February 3. Which is two sleeps away! And I am so anxious and excited for that day to be here. Dustin and I have been anticipating this day for over six months now, and it is finally right around the corner! HOORAY!!!

So, last night on our way home, we started discussing which one of us was going to go up on the stand and be the spokesman for our family. I thought Dustin should, and he thought I should. What a surprise right? Well, after some discussion, we decided I would do it. Now, I am so nervous! What if I get up there and as I am talking I start to studder, or can't think of a word, or.... These are all things that happen when I am nervous! So...I am going to have to take a valium just to get through it! LOL...okay not really but I am nervous.

I called our social worker at the end of last week to make sure she remembered, and she did. She had our papers and everything all done and waiting in her file. So, that's good. I asked her a couple of questions and can you believe the whole court session is about 15 minutes long! We wait 6 months for 15 minutes! LOL...it is crazy stuff.

If you are wondering what court will do for us, I will tell you. It makes Carter officially ours. Right now our adoption agency is actually the guardian of Carter. He still has his birthmom's last name, and no social security number. His birth certificate has his birth parents on it, and we don't have access to any of that. However, Carter will when he is older.

Going to court will do a lot for our family. Carter will officially become Dustin Carter Adams, we will get a birth certificate with our names on it as his parents, and we will be able to get a social security number for him. We will also become the guardians, and official parents to our little man. So court is a BIG deal!

Last night I had a dream that I found Nekeita on facebook. As I was reading her profile, she had filled out the 25 random things about her survey and they were all about Carter and her second guessing her . The dream really made me sad and I am so grateful it was just a dream. I hope Keita is at peace with her decision and knows Carter is in good hands!

Anyway, all and all, in two days, our little boy officially becomes our little boy! It doesn't get better than that!